Comedy is the difference between how you see a person and how they see themselves.
Too large a morsel chokes the child.
Anybody who enjoys being in the House of Commons probably needs psychiatric help.
Perfection is really boring!
A grasshopper can leap 20 times the length of its own body.
'Tis said that wrath is the last thing in a man to grow old.
Setting points targets is sometimes the worst thing you can do - it puts pressure on.
There's no such thing as a partisan base.
In war, you can only be killed once, but in politics, many times.
I have learned not to worry about love; but to honor its coming with all my heart.
It can take me many months to write one of my own songs.
I did a lot of ridiculous television. Between 1980 and '85 I had no confidence, so I did everything I was told to do.
The flat-out worst movie I've ever seen has to be Uwe Boll's 'Rampage.'
When I grew up, my model of God was like a lifeguard I knew He loved me, but He blew his whistle a lot.
If you want to know anything about me, read my books - it's all there.
Below the navel there is neither religion nor truth.
A clear conscience laughs at false accusations.
The winner has many friends, the loser has good friends.
A fool's tongue is long enough to cut his own throat.
Time is a wealth of change, but the clock in its parody makes it mere change and no wealth.
When the sky falls we'll all catch larks.
Silence was never written down.
He that is warm thinks all so.
If you would shoot a general, shoot his horse first.
With money, a dragon - without it, a worm.
Silence is the voice of complicity.
Do not rejoice at my grief, for when mine is old yours will be new.
If the mountain won't come to mohammed, mohammed must go to the mountain.
Before telling secrets on the road, look in the bushes.
The eye that sees all things else, sees not itself.
